FINAL FANTASY X BATTLE ICON THEATRE

Part 11


Tidus
Tidus:
AIIIGH-- wait, that's not Sin.
Auron
Auron:
No, it's just a generic Sin-spawn thing boss.
Tidus
Tidus:
Should we really be wasting time on it when SIN is due to show up any minute?
Auron
Auron:
Kill the boss, boy, or there will be no plot for you.
Crusaders:
CHAAAAAAARGE!! Aim for the flakey bits!
The Flakey Bits:
Whee!
Sin
Sin:
BRARGH BLARGH RAR. And also, FWOOOSH.
Crusaders:
Thud.
Yuna
Yuna:
Help, Tidus! You didn't kill the pointless boss hard enough!
Seymour
Seymour:
This obviously calls for someone with a much larger... hairdo.
Al Bhed:
E uhmo naknad dryd E ryja pid uha meva du keja vun draca dudym yccrydc. VENA!
Sin
Sin:
Achoo.
Al Bhed:
Ir ur.
Yuna
Yuna:
Hold on, everyone! I'll, uh... I'll summon! Yeah!
Seymour
Seymour:
Lady Yuna, no! You barely have a hairdo at all!
Tidus
Tidus:
Just look at this scene of horrible death and devestation! If only there were someone here I knew personally to really drive the point home. We people of Zanarkand see four thousand murders on television by the time we're eighteen, after all.
Tidus
Tidus:
... OH MY GOD! You killed... Gazzu? Was that his name? I don't know. YOU BASTARD!
Tidus
Tidus:
Oh, dammit, I always lose track of how long it's been since I've had a good prophetic dream until it's too late, like when I'm trying to hold my breath while swimming in a bay full of Sin toxin.
Tidus
Tidus:
Yeah, yeah, the flashback, too. Why shouldn't I be reflecting on the fact that my dad was a cruel alcoholic and I was a complete brat? No time like the cold, wet, highly poisonous present.
Freaky Robed Child
Freaky Robed Child:
Hello again!
Tidus
Tidus:
What could this incredibly subtle imagery mean?!
Auron
Auron:
Boy! You still alive?
Tidus
Tidus:
Huh?
Auron
Auron:
That's what I thought.
Kinoc
Maester Kinoc:
Well, that certainly was satisfying. I mean horrible.
Seymour
Seymour:
Lady Yuna, you look a bit down.
Yuna
Yuna:
Waah.
Seymour
Seymour:
You obviously need a... "pillar of strength."
Yuna
Yuna:
...
Seymour
Seymour:
Like Lady Yunalesca had her Lord Zaon.
Yuna
Yuna:
...
Seymour
Seymour:
You will note my highly expressive eyebrows.
Yuna
Yuna:
Hard not to!
Auron
Auron:
So, as I was saying a few hours ago, your father is Sin.
Tidus
Tidus:
Yeah, it's really beginning to-- I mean no! I don't believe you! I hate you!
Auron
Auron:
He does nothing but kill, and will do nothing but kill, until he is killed. And he wants you to kill him, since he feels deep guilt about how he treated you as a child and leaving you fatherless.
Tidus
Tidus:
How do you know all this?
Auron
Auron:
Oh, look at that, your quota's run out again.
Yuna
Yuna:
Come on, you two, we're leaving before Seymour can think of any more scary metaphors!